{"id":11712,"date":"2026-02-07T01:09:13","date_gmt":"2026-02-07T09:09:13","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.seekyourlove.com\/?p=11712"},"modified":"2026-02-07T01:09:13","modified_gmt":"2026-02-07T09:09:13","slug":"how-one-dad-helped-his-children-through-unimaginable-tragedy","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.seekyourlove.com\/?p=11712","title":{"rendered":"How one dad helped his children through unimaginable tragedy"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/static.independent.co.uk\/2026\/02\/06\/10\/06093117-f9420ff4-3570-487c-8fb9-1ad85978b196.jpg?width=1200&amp;auto=webp&amp;crop=3%3A2\" \/><\/p>\n<div id=\"main\">\n<div>\n<div class=\"hydrate-root sc-10wlkbs-0\" data-component=\"SupportNSCNative\" data-loading=\"lazy\" data-theme-name=\"base\">\n<aside class=\"sc-hez36s-0 dFpFuY\">\n<div class=\"sc-hez36s-1 iBibVd\">\n<h3 data-testid=\"support-nsc-title\" class=\"sc-hez36s-2 jVZWGn\">Your support helps us to tell the story<\/h3>\n<div class=\"sc-hez36s-8 juUDRT\">\n<div class=\"sc-hez36s-13 cqPbFA\">\n<div class=\"sc-aja53j-0 rAFIl sc-hez36s-16 jZSKtc\">\n<div class=\"sc-aja53j-6 PdmgT\">\n<div data-testid=\"dropdown-with-gradient-collapsed-content-container\" class=\"sc-aja53j-5 eZqxmv\">\n<div>\n<div data-testid=\"dropdown-with-gradient-collapsed-content\" class=\"sc-aja53j-4 tawua\">\n<div>\n<div data-testid=\"support-nsc-collapsed-content-tablet\" class=\"sc-hez36s-7 gZmYS\">\n<p class=\"sc-1uza6dc-0 iCTyfe\">From reproductive rights to climate change to Big Tech, The Independent is on the ground when the story is developing. Whether it&#8217;s investigating the financials of Elon Musk&#8217;s pro-Trump PAC or producing our latest documentary, &#8216;The A Word&#8217;, which shines a light on the American women fighting for reproductive rights, we know how important it is to parse out the facts from the messaging.<\/p>\n<p class=\"sc-1uza6dc-0 iCTyfe\">At such a critical moment in US history, we need reporters on the ground. Your donation allows us to keep sending journalists to speak to both sides of the story.<\/p>\n<p class=\"sc-1uza6dc-0 iCTyfe\">The Independent is trusted by Americans across the entire political spectrum. And unlike many other quality news outlets, we choose not to lock Americans out of our reporting and analysis with paywalls. We believe quality journalism should be available to everyone, paid for by those who can afford it.<\/p>\n<p><strong class=\"sc-1uza6dc-1 cglitp\">Your support makes all the difference.<\/strong><\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<p><button class=\"sc-aja53j-1 keLMOw sc-aja53j-7 eMEmGu\"><span data-testid=\"dropdown-with-gradient-dropdown-tablet\" class=\"sc-aja53j-3 dHXFkr\"><span data-action-type=\"Read more\" class=\"sc-aja53j-2 dcYUYI\">Read more<\/span><svg class=\"sc-eaj12q-0 hUgQwJ sc-culv3z-0 eifaJK sc-a5wy94-0 hyKPon\"><use href=\"#ee6613da15642019\"\/><\/svg><\/span><\/button><\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/aside>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<p>Stuart Green and his three children faced unthinkable tragedy when the mother of his three children, Mia Mascarinas-Green, shot while driving the children home from school.<\/p>\n<p>The human rights and environmental laywer was hit in the head by nine bullets during a 2017 attack near their home in the Philippines.<\/p>\n<p>The gunmen then turned the gun on the children who were sitting in the back seat \u2013 but the gun reportedly miraculously jammed. The 18-month-old twins and their nine-year-old sister were physically unharmed \u2013 although left with the mental scars of witnessing the attack.<\/p>\n<p>Within days of the murder \u2013 which has led to an ongoing case in the Philippines \u2013 the British-born marine biologist moved back to the UK with the children.<\/p>\n<p>A Global Witness report in 2015 found that killings of environmental activists were increasing \u2013 with at least 116 murdered in 2014. The NGO found the worst-hit countries at the time were Brazil, Colombia, Honuduras and the Phillippines.<\/p>\n<p>The dad-of-three is keen to stress that they have not \u2018bounced back\u2019 from the tragedy, but instead have bounced forward, and he has chronicled how his family emerged from the darkness in his book, The Regenerate Leap.<\/p>\n<p><iframe src=\"https:\/\/www.instagram.com\/p\/DTcsp4AFk_J\/embed\/captioned\" frameborder=\"0\" scrolling=\"no\" class=\"sc-wn0aau-1 dZPXBi\"><\/iframe><\/p>\n<p>Drawing on his work as an ocean regeneration advisor, Green highlights the surprising parallels between ocean regeneration and both family and business life to show how damaged ecosystems and devastated lives both possess the capacity to emerge stronger than before.<\/p>\n<p>It\u2019s about not just surviving after tragedy, but thriving, he insists.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cEveryone kept saying just be resilient,\u201d says Green, 54. \u201cBut resilience is about going back to the past, and there was no past for us \u2013 Mia was gone.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cWe had to leave the country because the kids are eyewitnesses to the murder. So we left everything in 10 days \u2013 we lost Mummy, and for security reasons we then lost our home, job, schools, everything. So we literally had three bags, but we were lucky because we were able to come back to the UK.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI had three little faces looking at me for answers I did not have, and I was supposed to be strong while my whole world was falling apart. So we started from scratch \u2013 they didn\u2019t need magic, they didn\u2019t need too many answers, they just needed me to be there.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Green wrote 500 journals over the subsequent years, describing them as \u201cmy only place to put my sanity\u201d, but it was only about 18 months ago, when he sensed his children could \u201cjust be children again\u201d and were finally able to have fun, that he felt he could explore what happened and the process his family had come through.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI wanted to look at the steps you can walk your family through to come out of what was a pretty horrendous situation and get to a place where the kids miss Mummy and always will do, but we\u2019re all willing to move on with our lives,\u201d he explains.<\/p>\n<p>Green\u2019s own Regenerate Leap was about learning how to guide his children despite his own grief, and he stresses that as well as being for business and community leaders, his book is for parents facing crises that tear their families apart, like death, divorce and trauma, who still need to provide hope and stability for their children.<\/p>\n<p>He says the twins \u2013 a boy and a girl now aged 10 who he calls James and Grace Jr in the book \u2013 don\u2019t really remember what happened to their mother, although his son had nightmares afterwards, shouting \u2018Go away bad man!\u2019.<\/p>\n<p>His elder daughter, named Grace Sr in the book, remembered what happened, has had counselling and is now 18 and studying law at university. \u201cShe\u2019s decided to fully confront the devils in her mind, and she\u2019s flipped it so that she now wants to follow Mummy in her exact career path,\u201d says her proud dad.<\/p>\n<p>Green \u201creframed\u201d what happened as a car accident to his younger children until they were aged about eight, and they had trauma counselling before he told them what really happened to their mother.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cThey remembered,\u201d he says, \u201cbut it\u2019s really been hidden deep down, so we\u2019ve had to pull it out and reframe it for them.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI think it\u2019s very important that they understand what happened and not to be scared about it. And the way we\u2019ve framed it is that Mummy was very brave, and she stood for her principles on certain things, and these people didn\u2019t like that, but we will always stand for our principles.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cAnd you can\u2019t let people come in and kill you to silence you. For me, that\u2019s a very important narrative within our family, that we stand behind Mia and everything she did. We are very proud of her for standing up for her principles.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>In a bid to help other families and leaders come through crises stronger than they were before, Green outlines a Regenerate Framework in his book to help them understand that \u201ctheir deepest wounds can become their greatest sources of strength and wisdom\u201d.<\/p>\n<p>The framework has three phases \u2013 raze, where you clear away what no longer serves a purpose and recognise your new reality; enrich, where you build the capability you need for the future, gaining new skills and support systems; and grow, where you emerge stronger than you were before the crisis by adapting your approach based on your new reality.<\/p>\n<p>He explains: \u201cBasically, it\u2019s like a forest fire \u2013 everything burns down, you raze, you clear out, and if that leaves some lovely compost, you need to seed the compost and build that. And then you get to the grow phase. But you need to go through each of the three phases \u2013 you can\u2019t just jump to grow without going through enrich or raze.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>He advises parents who\u2019ve experienced a crisis not to try and understand it initially. \u201cJust focus on what you have control over in the first few days, the sense-making will come over time,\u201d he says.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cThen find your angels \u2013 who\u2019s really there for you, whether it\u2019s your family or your friends, and lean on them. Without some of the angels that I had in those first days, I wouldn\u2019t have got through it.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Green recalls that he and the kids didn\u2019t laugh for many months after Mia\u2019s death, and then one night he did pizza for dinner, and burned it badly.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cIt was like death by daddy pizza,\u201d he remembers. \u201cI got really upset about it, and my eldest just started laughing, and then we all laughed. And it was the first time I realised you can still be happy.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cWe call it happy-sad, but you don\u2019t have to feel guilty about enjoying life. Slowly when you\u2019re ready, let joy come back into your life. My joy really has been working with the kids, they\u2019ve become my full purpose, my energy \u2013 I wouldn\u2019t have got through that whole experience without them.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>So are they happy again now?<\/p>\n<p>\u201cHappy-sad,\u201d he says. \u201cIt\u2019s like the British weather \u2013 some days are lovely and sunny and some days are wintry and rainy. But there\u2019s definitely more sunny days now.\u201d<\/p>\n<p><strong>The Regenerate Leap by Stuart Green is independently published, priced \u00a314.46. Available now.<\/strong><\/p>\n<\/div>\n<p><script async src=\"\/\/www.instagram.com\/embed.js\"><\/script><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Your support helps us to tell the story From reproductive rights to climate change to Big Tech, The Independent is on the ground when the story is developing. Whether it&#8217;s investigating the financials of Elon Musk&#8217;s pro-Trump PAC or producing our latest documentary, &#8216;The A Word&#8217;, which shines a light on the American women fighting for reproductive rights, we know how important it is to parse out the facts from the messaging. At such a critical moment in US history, we need reporters on the ground. Your donation allows us to keep sending journalists to speak to both sides of the story. The Independent is trusted by Americans across the entire political spectrum. And unlike many other quality news outlets, we choose not to lock Americans out of our reporting and analysis with paywalls. We believe quality journalism should be available to everyone, paid for by those who can afford it. Your support makes all the difference. Read more Stuart Green and his three children faced unthinkable tragedy when the mother of his three children, Mia Mascarinas-Green, shot while driving the children home from school. The human rights and environmental laywer was hit in the head by nine bullets during a 2017 attack near their home in the Philippines. The gunmen then turned the gun on the children who were sitting in the back seat \u2013 but the gun reportedly miraculously jammed. The 18-month-old twins and their nine-year-old sister were physically unharmed \u2013 although left with the mental scars of witnessing the attack. Within days of the murder \u2013 which has led to an ongoing case in the Philippines \u2013 the British-born marine biologist moved back to the UK with the children. A Global Witness report in 2015 found that killings of environmental activists were increasing \u2013 with at least 116 murdered in 2014. The NGO found the worst-hit countries at the time were Brazil, Colombia, Honuduras and the Phillippines. The dad-of-three is keen to stress that they have not \u2018bounc&#8230;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":11713,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[2],"tags":[],"acf":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.seekyourlove.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/11712"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.seekyourlove.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.seekyourlove.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.seekyourlove.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.seekyourlove.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=11712"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.seekyourlove.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/11712\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.seekyourlove.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/11713"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.seekyourlove.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=11712"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.seekyourlove.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=11712"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.seekyourlove.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=11712"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}